6 ways to Survives a Breakup, Broken Heart relationship
Breakups in every relationship are usually one-sided–one person walks off into the horizon while the other is left confused, angry, and sad. At this point, pretty much anything feels better than the pain you are feeling. When you’re heartbroken, the hurt, loneliness and vulnerability are acute.
So, go ahead and block the person from all of your social media, delete them from your contacts on your cell phone, and rip up all of those heartfelt letters where you still reigned supreme.
There are many people who, instead, become obsessed with their ex and do things that cause further pain to themselves and don’t help in the very important healing process include:
Finding any desperate excuse to contact them—picking up something they left at their ex’s house or returning an item of theirs.
Thinking of any reason—or none at all—to call or text the person.
Driving past their house or work.
Running into the ex’s best friend to casually bring up their name and find out what they’re up to.
Mending a broken heart is hard, and there is no fool-proof way to stop your heart from hurting. Unfortunately, you can’t go under, over or around the pain—you have to go through it. How do you get beyond the pain? The following are tips on how to patch up your heart and move on.
1) Focus on the positive.
You may ask how there can be a positive in this situation, but when you see clearer it may actually be a time to be thankful. Suppose the ex hadn’t walked out of your life now and, instead, broke up with you when you were one, two or three decades into the relationship? The journey to find your soulmate may be a long one no matter how old you are or how many breakups you have experienced along the way. But, it will be well worth it once you have found that person.
2) Fully experience your emotions.
It is healthy to express your emotions after a breakup. Some people can’t help but “wear their emotions on their sleeves,” but others keep their emotions private. While others ask how you are doing after a breakup, you may feel they don’t really want to hear the truth and just give the response that you’re doing fine. However, it doesn’t give the person the opportunity to help you or “walk with you” on the journey.
If you feel that you don’t have anybody you can really trust or feel comfortable sharing your feelings with, consider writing your thoughts. Writing is an ideal way to get your emotions out, and it takes effort to write thoughts out coherently and physically put them on paper. In addition, reading through your thoughts is great therapy and can help you to get a handle on the emotions you are experiencing.
4)Focus on your goals in life.
Rather than beating yourself up after having your heart broken, focus on making yourself happy. You were happy prior to this relationship, so get back to setting goals for yourself. When you are more active in your life, the better your chances are to meet people who share the same types of interests as you. Get your calendar out, and start filling it in with different activities, especially on the weekends. You may not enjoy it initially, but now is the time to keep busy and be with your friends.
5) Make a change.
This is a great time to do something as easy as change your daily routine. Perhaps you have always wanted to travel or move to another part of the country—this is your opportunity to do something different. Maybe you always wanted to join a club in your community, but you procrastinated because you were comfortable staying home with your ex or did the things they wanted to do instead. Now is your chance to make a positive change, and it will give you less energy to focus on the heartbreak.
6) Do something every day to help yourself heal.
Exercise, read, meditate. If you wake up early, take a walk or treat yourself to breakfast. Enjoy a shopping trip and buy yourself something, or go to a movie in the middle of the day. If you are unable to sleep, do a crossword puzzle, read or watch television. Don’t sit in the house, thinking about and replaying the relationship—free your mind so your heart can heal.
7) Don’t be a doormat.
If your ex continues to call or won’t go away, assertively tell them you can’t heal with them around. Ask them to keep their distance.8) Don’t mask the pain by finding a replacement.
A “rebound relationship” happens when you unconsciously use another person to fill the gap that was created by the ending of a relationship. While these relationships can seem healing in the short-term, you won’t truly process your pain appropriately and be able to be in a fully committed partnership in the long-term.
9) Don’t spend too much time alone.
Visit with friends or make new ones, have coffee with somebody you can talk to or volunteer in your community. It’s healthy to have alone time, but by isolating yourself you won’t be able to fully process your feelings or get the support you need to heal.
@dreammassive.com.ng
@dreammassive.com.ng